leafboy
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Yearly Journal
Star this Commitment
Week 10 of 52
leafboy commits to:
Reporting at least on a weekly basis.
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My Commitment Journal
 leafboy
August 20, 2024, 1:26 AM
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| Inner work is needed for the preparation of the RBT position. Or a counselor. When Nailah said to me "You're a man of the people", it felt like a challenge to my current self-belief. Like, there was resistance of accepting that sentiment. She clarified saying you listen to others, caring, and (some other thing she said). I think it would be beneficial to do some visualization manifestation exercises. Mentally prepare myself. Being of service to others requires a shift in how I present myself to the world. | |
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leafboy
August 4, 2024, 4:55 PM
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1 Corinthians 10:13 No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it. |
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leafboy
August 4, 2024, 4:52 PM
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| It might be off the wall to say, but I do think uncontrolled eating leads to uncontrolled lust. Therefore, one of the best strategies I can do to control my sexual desires, is to control my eating habits. Intermittent fasting is a great starting point for me. Although I already ate breakfast this morning and drank chai, I want to make my primary focus on controlling these impulses and focusing on something else. I realize unbalanced forces will come into my life and steer me away from my goals. But with God's will, anythings possible. I believe God will help me control my desires because he wants me to do so. He will guide me. He will grant me the strength to not fall into temptation. | |
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leafboy
August 4, 2024, 4:18 PM
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I had a dream. It featured this one skinny older Indian guy preaching to a group of us in a room. He directed his attention to me and said the conversion wouldn't be a problem, and commenting on some Islamic names. Then later in the night, there were comfort women being sent to each of the men's rooms. I hesitantly agreed for the woman to come in and we slept in the same bed. I didn't get to see her, it was more of a presence. She felt like she was shorter than I was. I was laying my right side, and wanted her to put her arm around my midsection. Initially it was comforting. Then I noticed at some point, my energy was being drained. Then I realized it was a trap. I went away and left the woman. I couldn't help but feel naked or something, despite me having no sexual intercourse with the woman. Some time has passed, and I was surprised to see Raj to actually turn down his comfort woman from the beginning. He was on his way to exercise, and I wanted to join him. The dream ended soon after that. I feel like there is a message to be gained from this. |
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