Started taking tongkat ali. Feels pretty good. Working out everyday. coffee today with the stipulation that no internet surfing is allowed. |
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Finishing out with no caffine. Already feel much better. Did this on monday and tuesday. Today is day three. I want to get to at least next monday then repeat this challenge. |
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Instead of going to bed at 9, i invited a girl from tinder over for a massage. Accidently came and broke my streak. Doesnt matter much since the streak was over anyway when I downloaded the apps and edged. Felt horrible. Wanted her out of my place immediately after I came. Felt stupid and lonely after. Washed sheets and got poor sleep before volunteering the next day. Was much more nervous and awkward in front of people. (still had a good time and had good conversation). Overall very negative weekend spending so much time on the apps. I got a few work things done (set up website, set up notes table, reordered cones, made food for week). Markedly less productive and happy while doing these apps. It is so frustrating that I get lonely and depressed without them and ashamed and sleep deprived when on them. I want out of both. The only way is to build healthy relationships. I just dont know if that is going to happen for me in a reasonable time. |
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If I hadnt done that I would be on a completely different trajectory of waking up at 630am fully reseted with self esteem. |
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